


Lost It All

by LoeyBlossom



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Depression, Grief/Mourning, M/M, MAMA Era Powers (EXO), Revenge, a bit of hurt/ comfort, based off the Obsession mv, lots of mention of blood/ injuries, non consensual kiss?, this is gonna be sad, working to overcome grief
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:34:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22353430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoeyBlossom/pseuds/LoeyBlossom
Summary: Sehůn took Chanyeol's entire world away. The only thing left for Chanyeol to do is to take his revenge and destroy him.
Relationships: Oh Sehun/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 4
Kudos: 34





	Lost It All

**Author's Note:**

> *shows up late with an iced coffee* The hype for the comeback might be over, but I had this idea and it might have taken me almost 2 months since the comeback to complete it, but I really wanted to share this fic. I hope you enjoy and buckle up and maybe grab some tissues ;)  
> I was the only one to beta it, so any mistakes you may find is all on me
> 
> (also a reupload, but I didn't change anything in case you are one of the few who read it before I deleted it)

All eyes are anxiously staring at the blinking dot that indicates Sehun’s current location. Exactly 24 minutes ago Jongin had teleported him to the abandoned building where they have tracked Sehůn to.

For months EXO has been researching, observing, and gathering information about exotic, evil beings who are exactly like them and dubbed themselves as X-EXO. Since X-EXO’s discovery, there has been a drastic increase of abnormal activities such as explainable/ unpredictable tsunamis, light orbs in the skies, F-5 tornadoes, widespread fires, and destructive lightning storms all across the world.

For a reason that no one can answer or explain, Minseok, Kyungsoo, and Yixing appear to not have any evil clones, or at least ones that have been discovered. Due to this fact, Junmyeon had sent them into hiding in fear that their evil versions, if they even have one, will get to them first and take them out. They are currently scattered across the globe, but they still have contact with their leader and the others.

It has been what feels like countless months before they had even managed to pinpoint one of their clone’s location for more than a few days. It’s been weeks, and it appears that X-Sehůn has settled into one spot. Thus, that is what had rolled the ball into motion and planning began to take down the first X-EXO being before more tragedies can occur.

Now, here they sit, waiting for any updates from Sehun. Once he takes out his clone he was instructed to, if able to, head back to where Jongin plopped him off and call in for pickup. It had been decided long ago that the only way to take down their doppelgangers was by themselves. If the clones are exactly like them, but use their powers for evil, then they should still have the same strengths and weaknesses. The only one who would know that information better than anyone is that person.

Though it has been nearly half an hour with no word at all, Chanyeol, and the others have great faith in Sehun. Of course, he has to be quiet in order to sneak up on someone to try to kill them. Though his long, lanky legs would suggest otherwise, Sehun is actually quite graceful. He has been gifted with the ability to blend into shadows and move just as silently along with them.

All of a sudden, Chanyeol doubles over as a sharp pain pangs across his chest. He instinctively fists his right hand in his shirt over the area where he feels it. He struggles to breathe, his heart feeling like it’s being stabbed in one spot and the pain is spreading across his entire chest.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Chanyeol?” Jongdae is the first to react to Chanyeol’s sudden doubling over. Chanyeol wishes he could reply to his member, but the pain is too much for him to think about stringing words together. He clenches his eyes shut, trying not to cry out. He can vaguely feel Jongdae’s small hand rubbing circles along his back as he tries to figure out what’s wrong with him.

“Get him out, now!” Chanyeol swears he can hear Junmyeon scream through his pain induced daze, voice clearly, undeniably, full of panic.

Just like that, the pain is suddenly gone. Chanyeol gulps for air as if he had been drowning. His eyes slide open and he can finally sit back up in his seat straight. That’s when he notices that Jongdae’s hand, though still resting against his back, has stilled. He, along with Baekhyun and Junmyeon, are staring at the blip on the screen with looks of pure distress. Jongin, who had been sitting next to Baekhyun, isn’t in the room anymore.

Chanyeol’s stomach sinks in fear.

Jongin reappears in the center of the room a few seconds later, a lump of something draped over his arms. It takes Chanyeol half a second later to process what exactly that lump of something is.

“Sehun!”

_Chanyeol fidgeted with his fingers in worry as he watched his boyfriend gear up in preparation of fighting Sehůn. Sehun was calm, almost unbothered, as he slipped on his gloves before he began counting out arrows and checking over his bow. It was almost as if he was reading over his grocery list before he left for the market. Chanyeol let him work in silence, knowing that he would only distract the other with countless pleas to be careful and to come home safe if he opened his mouth._

_“It’s almost time for me to go,” Sehun said quietly, finally turning his full attention to Chanyeol to symbolize that he completed what he needed to do._

_At the words, Chanyeol lunged at him, squashing him so hard to his chest that he is surprised he didn’t hear ribs cracking. He let tears pour over his eyes, allowing them to wet his cheeks as he gripped Sehun in his embrace. Sehun clung back just as tightly, secretly trying his hardest not to let his own tears spill over._

_He might seem cool and confident, but it was only a facade. If his boyfriend knew of the internal anxiety that was a raging storm in his stomach, it would only upset Chanyeol further. Knowing him, he would have begged Junmyeon to let him take Sehun’s spot to defeat his X version or call off the entire mission, neither of which would happen._

_Though Sehun was the younger one in the relationship, he cooed reassuring whispers into Chanyeol’s ear and traced random lines absentmindedly along Chanyeol’s spine as the older sobbed into the crook of his neck. Sehun wanted to bring as much peace and comfort as he could to his boyfriend, even in a tense moment like now._

_“Please, please, please, be safe,” begged Chanyeol against Sehun’s lips after pressing a long kiss to them._

_“I will. I have to make it back. I have a hot as hell boyfriend to come home to.” Sehun licked his lips, tasting the faint trace of salt that lingered all because of Chanyeol’s wet lips. It pained Sehun to see his boyfriend so broken, but he attempted a smile. He knew if he smiled, Chanyeol would mirror it, even if by the faintest bit._

_“I’ll be waiting for you with arms wide open.” Just like Sehun predicted, Chanyeol had unknowingly let a smile slip across his lips. Pleased, Sehun leaned over to steal a kiss, which Chanyeol undoubtedly accepted._

_They held each other for minutes, savoring the privacy the other guys had given them as they set up Sehun’s tracking device and comm piece in a different room. They pressed a million kisses to each other’s lips, noses, foreheads, and cheeks. No part of each other’s face was left without a peck. It was peaceful in those moments, both momentarily forgetting about what was to come in the next few minutes._

_Baekhyun was the one who interrupted them and shattered their moment by knocking on the door of the bedroom to inform Sehun that everything had been set up and was working perfectly. It hurt him to break up the lovers, but the sooner Sehun destroyed Sehůn, the quicker he and Chanyeol could be back home with their precious puppies. He watched as Chanyeol’s arms visibly tightened around the younger before Sehun whispered to him that he needed to do this. With a kicked puppy look, Chanyeol finally released Sehun._

_One hand carrying his weapon and his other in Chanyeol’s hand, they walked out to regroup with the others. Junmyeon attached the tracking device to Sehun while he put the comm into his ear. Once everything was in place, they spent a few minutes wishing Sehun well and hyping him up._

_It was hard to keep the playful air that they always have while around each other as they were about to send Sehun off, but Baekhyun sure helped by clinging onto Sehun from behind whining at him to come back home in once piece because ‘who else will I play PUBG with?’. Junmyeon, Jongdae, and Jongin also gave him a hug while Baekhyun still clung to him like a monkey. Only when it was Chanyeol’s turn for another final goodbye did Baekhyun slip off._

_“I love you. I love you so, so much.” Chanyeol was back to circling his arms back around his boyfriend and pressing kisses to his lips._

_“I love you, too. Don’t you ever forget that, okay?” Sehun looked deeply into Chanyeol’s eyes. They were glassy due to unshed tears, but Sehun still loved them all the same. They might be brown just like his, but they always shone bright like the sun and sparkled like the stars._

_“I’ll never.”_

_Sehun then pulled Chanyeol into a bruising kiss, taking all the air out of Chanyol’s lungs. It wasn’t a goodbye kiss, but rather a good luck one. With the memory of his lover’s taste and soft lips against his, Sehun could achieve anything. They pulled away, waves of pure love flowing between them as Chanyeol brushed the apple of Sehun’s cheek._

_“Ready?” Jongin asked, hating to break up such a personal moment. Though the other four were standing right there, at that moment, it was only Chanyeol and Sehun in their own little world._

_“As I’ll ever be,” Sehun sighed, breaking apart from Chanyeol’s hold. It’s okay, though, since he would be back in his arms again soon._

_“Get that evil clone!” Baekhyun cheered, slapping Sehun’s ass in encouragement. The action barely fazed him as he latched onto Jongin’s arm so he could teleport him. With a final wave and a last reassuring smile from Sehun, Jongin disappeared._

_Seconds later Jongin reappeared with a report that Sehun was safely dropped off at the designated spot._

_The wait had now begun._

Chanyeol bolts out of his chair and over to Jongin who is holding Sehun bridal style. Once he stops in front of the teleporter, he wants to become sick. Sticking out of his boyfriend’s chest is one of his own arrows. He was shot through the heart in the exact area where Chanyeol had felt the sudden, intense pain.

“Get him to the med room!” Junmyeon barks. Wordlessly, Jongin blinks out of sight.

Though his mind is completely muddled, Chanyeol somehow manages to pull his legs into the direction of the medical room. He thinks he spots Junmyeon pulling out his phone, most likely to contact the healer, but Chanyeol is focused on racing to the room. He can hear footsteps following him, assuming they are Jongdae’s and Baekhyun’s.

Though the medical room hasn’t been used in months, Yixing’s overly worried self had made sure everything was fully stocked before he went into hiding just in case. Now, for the first time in a long while, Chanyeol bursts into the hospital like room.

Jongin has already laid out Sehun on one of the beds. The second youngest is beside him, smoothing out his hair as he babbles out words of reassurance through choked back tears.

“It’s gonna be okay, Hunnie. Hyungs are gonna take care of you. You’re gonna be okay. Just hang on.”

Chanyeol didn’t think it was possible, but his heart twists even more at seeing the other youngest in a teary mess. Though everyone is close to Sehun, and Chanyeol is his boyfriend, Jongin and Sehun have a bond unlike anyone else’s with being the two youngest.

The two of them are immensely babied by their hyungs and they know the older ones would do anything for them. They always act upon that fact when they want something from one of them. One too many times they have both ganged up one of their hyungs and pouted while flashing puppy dog eyes in order to get their way and obtain their wishes.

The two also have what seems like a billion inside jokes that no one else can even begin to comprehend. Even just a knowing look from one to the other can send them into a fit of giggles for minutes. They’ll spend hours upon hours playing video games with each other or spend nights just talking to each other about the silliest of topics. It’s obvious that Sehun and Jongin are best friends.

“Chanyeol h-hyung.” Jongin’s strangled cry breaks Chanyeol out of his thoughts.

Chanyeol is still standing in the doorway of the room, frozen to the ground. Only at Jongin’s calling does he realize that his whole entire body is shaking and that his vision is cloudy with tears. Jongdae and Baekhyun are inside the room, working to remove Sehun’s shirt while Jongin still has his fingers tangled in Sehun’s hair, momentarily pausing his actions.

Chanyeol roughly shakes his head to get rid of the plaguing thoughts. His unsteady legs carry him to the other side of Sehun’s bed. He turns a blind eye to the arrow to instead scoop up Sehun’s right hand into his roughened one. The action appears to capture his boyfriend's attention.

Sehun is barely able to turn his head in order to face his boyfriend. Chanyeol notes with a flicker of worry that his eyes are already becoming glassy. Without a doubt, the trauma that Sehun’s body has experienced with the injury is taking a great toll on him. Chanyeol just prays that they can get Yixing here before the damage becomes irreversible.

“I’m- I’m sorry,” Sehun manages to gasp out. It must be a struggle for him to speak since his breathing has become rapid and quick. After he lets out the words, he then cries out in pain. Jongdae or Baekhyun must have done something, but Chanyeol refuses to look away from his boyfriend’s unfocused eyes.

“It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault at all, baby.” Chanyeol can barely see through the tears again. He refuses to wipe them away since that would mean removing his hands from Sehun’s practically limp one. Instead, after making sure he isn’t in Baekhyun’s or Jongdae’s way, he leans down to brush his lips against Sehun’s one. He prays it’s just his imagination, but they don’t feel as warm as they usually do.

As he rises back up, he catches a glimpse of the arrow protruding from his chest. Blood is flowing out of the wound, streaking down Sehun’s porcelain skin. Before he can retch at the sight, Baekhyun and Jongdae make quick work of placing towels around the site in an attempt to do something, anything, about the lost blood.

At the pressure, Sehun squirms and gasps in pain. Sehun squeezes Chanyeol’s hand as waves of agony wash over him as the two attempt to staunch the blood flow. Chanyeol winces at the vice-like grip, but endures it since Sehun is experiencing something far worse than him.

Chanyeol wishes with all his might that he could be of more help to his boyfriend, but he can only settle for acting as an anchor for Sehun to hold onto. He runs his thumb over the back of his hand, whispering out assurances to Sehun through his own tears. He’s not even sure if Sehun is even listening, the amount of pain he’s in clouding his head.

“Jongin-ah.” Chanyeol can hear Junmyeon (When the hell did he even get in here?) call out to the younger. He looks up and spots the leader cupping Jongin’s face in order to get him to focus on him. “You need to go get Yixing so he can help Sehunnie. Can you do that? He’s back at his apartment. You remember where that is, right?” Chanyeol watches Jongin wordlessly nod. “Good.”

Though Junmyeon sounds as if he’s talking to a toddler with the tone he’s using, Chanyeol knows he feels sick with worry like the rest of them do. As being the leader, it’s his responsibility to remain calm and level headed even when all hell breaks loose. Inwardly, Chanyeol admires Junmyeon’s strength. Chanyeol’s shaking body and tear streaked face is an obvious indicator that he’s mentally not strong enough to keep in check at such times like this.

“Here that? Nini is getting Yixing hyung right now. Sehunnie?”

In the few seconds Chanyeol took to glance up at the two, Sehun’s eyes slipped shut. Jongdae and Baekhyun start calling his name and tapping his cheek to get him to open his eyes again.

“You gotta stay awake, Sehunnie,” urges Baekhyun. “C’mon, focus on me.” Though his eyes are glimmering with unshed tears, Baekhyun pulls silly faces at Sehun, even wiggling his fingers in front of his face to keep his attention. His attempts are useless since Sehun moans out and lets his eyes slip shut again.

Chanyeol releases one of his hands so he can reach up to cup his boyfriend’s cheek. Due to the loss of blood, Sehun’s skin has become paler than normal and sweat slicked. When Chanyeol’s palm comes in contact, he flinches at how the flesh has become cool and clammy. He swallows the lump in his throat at the multiple obvious signs of blood loss. At the feeling of something against his cheek, Sehun’s eyes peek open a fraction.

“Yixing is gonna be here in a second. Just stay awake for us, okay, love? I know it’s hard, but you have to.” Chanyeol brushes his thumb over Sehun’s cheek just as he had done right before he left. It makes him sick to his stomach that the same action isn’t being done in the joyous way he thought would happen when his boyfriend returned home.

Just as Sehun’s clouded eyes begin to shut again, there is a sudden announcement of “I’m here”. Immediately, Jongdae and Baekhyun shuffle out of the way to make room for Yixing. The commotion makes Sehun’s open for a second, but at this rate, he’s too weak to even keep them open. He can’t even turn his head to face the healer. Every second he’s closer to slipping into complete unconsciousness.

Seeing Yixing calms Chanyeol down the slightest bit. With him finally here, he can take care of Sehun and patch him right up.

Yixing starts cooing his own soothing words to Sehun as he assesses his injury. He then places his palm on his chest right beside the arrow after he removed the bloodied towels. Sehun whimpers again, but this time it’s a noticeably weaker sound.

“Shh, shh, I know. I know it hurts.” Yixing’s calm voice in itself is healing. His right hand reaches up to wipe the sweat away from Sehun’s face as his left remains on his chest. All of a sudden, Chanyeol sees Sehun’s body completely relax, as if he had fallen asleep. In his hand, Sehun’s is totally limp, no longer gripping onto him even though the strength in his grip has lessened as the minutes passed.

“Sehun?” Chanyeol’s voice begins to rise in panic, but Yixing hushes him.

“Don’t worry. I blocked his nerve endings so that they wouldn’t send any pain signals. It’s better that he’s knocked out.” Chanyeol trusts the healer’s words since he knows best when it comes to injuries. Since he can’t stare into Sehun’s eyes, he settles for watching the stuttered rise and fall of his chest. It’s heartbreaking to watch, but it still assures Chanyeol that his boyfriend is still alive.

“Okay, I need someone to help take out the arrow. As soon as it is removed, I will begin healing.” Yixing’s voice, at the flip of a coin, becomes serious and authoritative.

“I’ll do it.” Junmyeon steps forward as soon as the words are out of Yixing’s mouth. The healer nods, motioning Junmyeon to his side while directing him where to place his hands and how to pull out the arrow. Jongdae, Baekhyun, and Jongin watch from the side of the room, each of them chewing their lips in worry.

Chanyeol remains by his boyfriend’s side, clutching onto his limp hand. Bile rises in his throat as he watches the bloodied arrow being removed, each inch that’s revealed making Chanyeol feel one step closer to hunching over and puking. He clenches his eyes shut, now thankful that Sehun is unconscious. He can’t even begin to imagine the sort of pain he would be experiencing if he were still awake as they remove the arrow.

A minute later, Junmyeon has the arrow in both hands and rapidly disposes of it as if it’s burning him. With it finally removed, Yixing instantly places both hands over the wound in Sehun’s chest, a look of determination and concentration settling over features. A familiar light green light blankets the area, his power seeping into Sehun’s skin. Everyone refuses to make a noise as Yixing works in silence.

Everything is fine for the first minute until Yixing’s face morphs into confusion then a second later pure panic lights up his face.

“No! No, no, no, no!”

“Wh-what’s wrong?” Chanyeol questions, the worry that had been dulled due to the healer’s arrival flares up at the words. The other four become more alert as well, uneasiness spreading through them at the panicked voice.

“Th-the damage. It’s... it’s too much. He’s already lost too much blood. I... I don’t think… I don’t think I can save him.” Yixing’s voice wobbles at his admission, but he keeps his hands firmly pressed over Sehun’s heart. The green light becomes brighter, but Chanyeol notices that in turn, sweat is breaking out along the healer’s forehead.

“Come on, Sehun-ah. I know you’re stronger than this. You’re so stubborn. There is no way you’re dying like this.” Yixing grits his teeth as he exerts himself to reverse the damage the arrow has done. Sweat is pouring down his temples by now, mixing with tears that have unknowingly escaped his tear ducts.

“Baby, baby, wake up!” Chanyeol grabs both of Sehun’s pale, clammy cheeks into his hands, rocking his head side to side in hopes the annoying action will rouse him. If he doesn’t make it, Chanyeol just wants to see his eyes that are so full of love for him one last time.

“He keeps getting weaker. I- I can’t do a thing. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” Yixing cries, clamping his eyes shut. He looks like he’s about to collapse any second with how much of his own energy he’s pouring into helping Sehun. His hands had begun to tremble when he started using more of his power, but by now, his entire body is shaking.

“You can’t give up, Sehunnie. We need you. Vivi needs you. I need you.” Chanyeol’s voice cracks at the end, the words barely audible. He leans down to press his lips to Sehun’s unresponsive ones. This time it’s clear that the warmth has been sapped from them and how they have now lost their lively pink color.

“He’s… he’s gone,” Yixing announces, removing his shaking arms away from Sehun’s skin. Yixing is almost as pale as the body in front of him. Tears stream down his face as he stares at his team member who he was trusted to heal. He couldn’t do it. He failed them. They lost a brother.

Yixing’s legs give out as he collapses onto the floor. Though the shock of hearing that Sehun is dead stuns them all, Jongdae still manages to catch Yixing before he hits the hard flooring. Jongdae gathers him into his lap, both sobbing now.

Chanyeol can’t hear Yixing’s rambles of “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” because it feels like time has frozen.

Numb to the bone, he stares blankly at Sehun’s eyelids that are now closed forever. He then turns his gaze to the lips he had just kissed that wouldn’t kiss back. He removes a hand from his cheek so he can grasp his hand again to squeeze it, making sure it’s enough to hurt. Sehun’s eyes don’t pop open nor does he whine at him that Chanyeol had hurt his hand.

Just in case Yixing is truly pulling the worst prank in the history of mankind, he then slides his fingers up to Sehun’s wrist, feeling for a pulse. When he doesn’t feel one, he reasons in denial that sometimes the wrist isn’t the best place to check for a pulse.

He reaches up to Sehun’s neck. His fingers are still shaking, but he supposes they haven’t stopped this entire time. On the side of Sehun’s neck that is exposed, Chanyeol places his middle and index finger along where he knows the pulse point is.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

“Sehun?” Chanyeol makes one final attempt to wake up Sehun. He doesn’t even twitch a muscle at his name.

Much like Yixing, Chanyeol crumples to the ground, everything hitting at once.

His chest heaves with the heart broken sob he lets out. His hand still clings to Sehun’s, which just sits there limp and lifeless. He knows it won’t happen, but he prays that if he keeps a hold of his boyfriend’s hand, he’ll eventually squeeze back to let Chanyeol know he’s there.

He doesn’t even realize he had shut his eyes when he doesn’t see someone reaching out to tug him against his chest. He refuses to open his eyes to see who it is, but Chanyeol can tell with the way he burrows his face into his member’s neck and with the pair of arms wrapped around him that it’s Junmyeon. He clings to the leader, his entire body shaking with the force of his cries.

This was never supposed to happen. Sehun was supposed to come back safe and sound without a hair missing on his pretty little head. He’d been training for months in order to win against X-Sehůn. They all had the highest faith in him that he could do this. They truly have underestimated X-EXO.

X-EXO might have won this battle, but now EXO is determined to win the war.

Chanyeol awakes with a start. For the past two months, this occurrence has become frequent. The little sleep he manages to get after hours of crying himself into exhaustion is interrupted by nightmares of the day Sehun died.

_“Jongin, I know it’s hard, but you have to go pick up Minseok and Kyungsoo so that they can say goodbye.”_

_Chanyeol had no idea how long he had been sitting on the couch in the lounge for. When he had cried out all his tears, for the time being, he became nothing but an empty shell. Someone, he didn’t even register which member it was, had coaxed him into the lounge so that he would be the slightest bit more comfortable. It had taken minutes to pry him from Sehun’s body that was growing colder with each passing second, but when he became too weak to try and fight back anymore, he was herded away from his dead boyfriend._

_“I don’t think I can do it, hyung,” Jongin said through his heavy sniffles. He, Junmyeon, and Jongdae were in the lounge as well. Yixing and Baekhyun were still in the medical room with Sehun. Chanyeol didn’t want to know what they were doing, even though he had an idea that it included cleaning up all the blood and taking care of Sehun’s body._

_“Yes, you can. It will be quick.” Junmyeon was back to using that soothing tone of his, but it was butchered with how thick his voice sounded from holding back his own waterfall of tears. “They already know what happened. They’re waiting for you.”_

_Jongin let out one last sniffle and wiped his left cheek before he vanished. A few seconds later, he reappeared with Kyungsoo. Junymeon praised him for picking up his hyung before Jongin left again and returned with Minseok._

_The two transports must have worn him out since Jongin dragged himself over to the couch Chanyeol was sitting on. He curled up into a tiny ball and placed his head on Chanyeol’s lap. Another wave of tears flowed out of Jongin’s eyes, his body shaking like a leaf. All Chanyeol could do to comfort him was numbly run his hand over his hair as if he were a zombie._

_Junmyeon guided Minseok and Kyungsoo, who were in complete shock, to the medical room. After a few minutes, he returned to gather Chanyeol, Jongdae, and Jongin. He wanted all of them to gather as a group to say more goodbyes._

_Half supporting Jongin, Chanyeol followed Junmyeon on jelly-like legs back into that horrible room. He was met with a still lifeless Sehun and the puffy, watery eyes of the group’s other two mentally strongest members._

_If Chanyeol’s heart still had pieces of it that could shatter, he’s sure they would have splintered right then and there._

Sehun’s lifeless face has yet to leave Chanyeol’s mind in peace, always haunting his thoughts no matter what time it is. Two months is still too little time to do any sort of healing for Chanyeol’s heart after Sehun’s passing. As cliche as it sounds, he believed Sehun was his soulmate. Without the younger by his side, Chanyeol’s life feels meaningless and colorless.

While everyone was deeply affected by Sehun’s death, Chanyeol was hit the hardest, which had sadly caused him to slip into a depression.

The day of Sehun’s funeral (Yixing and Baekhyun were the ones who prepared his body for it) was when Chanyeol finally realized that this was all real and that Sehun was never coming back. It had been a blur of runny noses, teary eyes, and piles of tissues for all eight of them as they tried their best to reminisce the wonderful memories they created with Sehun and all the joy his beautiful soul brought them.

After it was done, they had all gone back to Junmyeon’s mansion. They all live separately, but when needed to, they all gather at Junmyeon’s house. It’s big enough for the ni- eight of them to settle down comfortably. With everyone grieving over the loss of their maknae, they all found it best to keep together for the time being and support each other. Though, it’s a little difficult to lift someone up when you’re being dragged down as well.

That night, Chanyeol gasped for air as he was ripped out of a nightmare consisting of Sehun’s bloody body. He was begging Chanyeol to help him, crawling to him with the arrow lodged in his chest. Chanyeol was glued to his spot, helpless as his boyfriend then crumpled to the ground just a hair width out of reach. When Chanyeol was mysteriously unfrozen, Sehun was already gone. Just like in real life.

He had stared at the ceiling through the pitch black of his room, willing the fading images of his dream away. However, the more he laid awake afterwards, the more he realized his need to use the bathroom. Though he didn’t want to move a single muscle, he had enough decency and respect for himself not to piss the bed, so he dragged his zombie self out of the room and to one of the multiple bathrooms littered across the huge house.

As he passed by the other member’s rooms, he noticed light flooding out from under the door of Yixing’s room. He didn’t find it odd at all. It was no secret that all of them were struggling to sleep after what had recently happened. Besides, for all Chanyeol knew, it could only be 9 at night or something. He started to have a warped sense of time as of late.

Yixing was in a horrible state after Sehun’s death. He had blamed himself for his passing since his healing powers could do nothing to save him. Everyone, especially Chanyeol, had assured him that he tried his best. It wasn’t Yixing’s fault that the injury was so severe that it couldn’t be repaired. No matter how hard they tried to convince Yixing of this fact, the man continued to blame himself.

Chanyeol was pretty sure that one night Kyungsoo had ‘accidently’ cut himself with a knife while chopping carrots for dinner then asked Yixing to heal it. He had wanted to show the older that he could still take care of the remaining members and that he was greatly appreciated among them. No one hated Yixing for what couldn’t have been helped.

As Chanyeol padded past the room, he heard whispering. He paused, listening in to catch what was being said and who was saying it. Curiosity got the best of him over his need to use the bathroom.

He instantly wanted to cry again when he realized that Jongin was the one who was whispering. His voice was wobbly with his own tears as he begged Yixing to help heal Chanyeol’s broken heart. When he heard the plea, Chanyeol had to muffle his mouth with a hand to keep from letting any sound out.

Chanyeol strained his ears to hear Yixing’s response. Seconds later he heard his calm, soothing voice inform Jongin that healing a broken heart was impossible for any healer to fix, no matter how strong they were. Chanyeol was the only one powerful enough to help mend his broken heart.

Chanyeol could picture crystal clear Yixing pulling Jongin into his embrace and rocking him side to side as Jongin muffled his cries into the crook of his hyung’s neck. Chanyeol could practically see him then pulling Jongin down into the bed and cuddling him as they both cried themselves to sleep just like Chanyeol had done for the past few nights.

Chanyeol had turned right around and slunk back into his bedroom.

The past two months have truly been hell on earth. Without Sehun’s bubbly personality that brightened any room he was in, everything has become duller. Even when he was in a grumpy mood, his pouty face and childlike stubbornness still made his hyungs coo at him.

No one has laughed since that day, save for the few times Baekhyun retold some of his favorite memories of Sehun, but even then their laughs sounded fake and forced. The sun continues to shine, but Chanyeol doesn’t feel the warmth of it anymore.

In the past months, not only has Chanyeol’s mental health plunged off a cliff, so has his physical health and appearance.

He can’t even look at himself in the mirror anymore. With every shower and brushing of teeth he manages, his eyes are permanently downcast. He hasn’t been eating properly, only nibbling enough to keep his body from shutting down completely. Not even Kyungsoo’s amazing chef skills have been enough for Chanyeol to eat one full meal.

Kyungsoo might as well be sleeping in the kitchen with how much food he’s been cooking the past weeks in order to keep himself occupied. Even Minseok became overly obsessed with keeping Junmyeon’s house clean. It was impossible for dust or dirt to settle anywhere since Minseok would be on it in an instant. They were each finding ways to cope.

Chanyeol’s once round cheeks have hollowed out, his skin has lost its glow, and his bones have gradually started to become outlined under his skin. Even his hair has lost its shine and softness. His roots have also long since started growing back, contrasting with the cotton candy pink it was dyed many months ago. His face is covered in nicks due to hasty shaving since, even in mourning, he still doesn’t like the feel of facial hair.

Sehun would have a fit if he saw the current state that his boyfriend is in, but Sehun isn’t here, is he?

It’s another meaningless day of waking up in the emptiness of his room. Though everyone has a room in Junmyeon’s mansion, it was no surprise that one room went unused, it obviously being one for Sehun. Oh, how Chanyeol aches for the comforting warmth of the person he loves dearly when he wakes up. The nights are cold, but right now they are almost unbearable without Sehun snuggled up to his body. Chanyeol bitterly thinks that even if his room was 100 degrees he would still feel cold unless Sehun’s body was the one providing the warmth.

He forces himself from the bed, sluggishly dragging himself into the grand kitchen where he already smells food. While each of the guys have tried going back to their own separate houses, it seems like two months later they still prefer each other’s company over being alone with their own thoughts. Thankfully, Junmyeon doesn’t mind their stay and has the space to accommodate all of them.

Chanyeol has no idea what time it is, he didn’t bother looking. However, he does spot Junmyeon, Jongdae, Yixing, and Jongin eating, so he assumes it’s not that late in the morning. Kyungsoo is at the stove while Baekhyun and Minseok are nowhere to be seen.

“Morning, Chanyeol-ah,” greets Junmyeon softly. Ever since Sehun died, Junmyeon has been talking to him as if he is a scared animal. He knows the leader is worried about him, but he must admit that the babying voice is getting a bit old. If he had the energy, he would snap at him, but then he remembers that he lost Sehun too. Junmyeon practically helped raise him. That thought is what keeps Chanyeol’s mouth clamped shut.

“Morning,” he croaks out, settling into a spot at the long table. He says quick greetings to the others who say their own with hushed voices. They all look to be almost done with their servings.

“You want something to eat?” asks Kyungsoo. Chanyeol knows that saying no isn’t an option, and soon enough, food is placed in front of him even with him not saying a word. Once again, he only manages a few mouthfuls before his stomach threatens to reject it.

“Excuse me,” he mutters, pushing his plate away and standing back up so he can go back upstairs. He hears a faint sigh as he leaves, but he chooses to ignore it.

Minutes later, a knock softly echoes through the room. Chanyeol has been mindlessly petting Vivi since he came back into his room. When he left his room a few minutes earlier, the dogs must have wandered back inside. Though now, Vivi, along with Toben, jump off the bed so they can greet the visitor.

When they established that it was best for them to stay together, each male went home to gather their pets, clothes, and other needed items. They had all anticipated that after the mission was completed they would each go home to their separate houses.

For Chanyeol, it was like a new wound opened up when he entered his house to gather Toben and Vivi and his other stuff. He thought he would be returning home with Sehun, but it was only him and Jongin who transported him. He was in and out of the house he shared with Sehun in a flash, too overwhelmed with the fresh hole Sehun’s death left him with.

Vivi clearly noticed Chanyeol was alone that night, even noticing that his owner was nowhere to be found in Junmyeon’s house once he arrived. The first few weeks after Sehun died, Vivi would sit and stare at the door, waiting for his owner to walk through it. He eventually gave up, but now every time someone comes back home, he bolts to the front to see who it is like the rest of the dogs. However, Vivi looks visibly disappointed and saddened when he doesn’t see Sehun.

Chanyeol desperately wishes he can convey to the dog that Sehun will never walk through the door again.

Even poor Toben has caught onto his owner’s unhappiness and has been trying his best to make him happy again, but even puppy kisses are too weak of a cure for a broken heart. Both dogs have been snuggling with him for weeks, but unlike Chanyeol, they sleep in bliss and aren’t plagued with nightmares.

“Come in.”

“You know Sehun wouldn’t want to see you like this,” begins Junmyeon, ignoring the two dogs as they slip past him once the door is open. He then shuts it, stepping inside and over to the bed.

They’ve had this talk before. Despite a teammate’s death, they still have a mission to complete. The rest of the guys allowed themselves a time of mourning, but slowly but surely, keeping track of X-EXO became a priority again. Chanyeol knows that immersing themselves into research is their own way of coping, much like Kyungsoo and Minseok with theirs. However, all Chanyeol has done so far is mope.

“Sehun isn’t here,” Chanyeol responds bitterly, much like the last few times they have had this talk.

“You know he’s watching over you. Who knows, he could be standing right in front of you in ghost form yelling at you right now.” Junmyeon smiles a fraction at his own words. “I know you are still grieving, but this isn’t healthy at all.”

“I just miss him so much. It still feels like yesterday since he left us.” His voice cracks, memories of Sehun automatically invading his mind.

Their first kiss when they got caught in the rain after going out for lunch and Chanyeol had made a comment about how romantic it would be to kiss in the rain. The one time they went to the mall and ended up going into the pet store. Days later they returned with their new puppy, Toben. Vivi was jealous he wasn’t the only dog in the house anymore, but soon enough they became best friends. The memory of their one year anniversary where Chanyeol had sung a song he wrote for Sehun. He had never seen his boyfriend cry so much, but it was all out of happiness.

Now, Chanyeol is only left with the memories he had created with Sehun. It’s the only way to keep him alive in the present. By remembering.

“I know, I feel the same.” Junmyeon sighs, suddenly looking like he’s aged ten years.

Chanyeol knows it’s all a facade of him being ‘big strong leader’. Out of all of them, Junmyeon probably had the least amount of time to grieve. He still has seven other members to take care of and protect. He still has evil beings that are slowly destroying the world to track down and eradicate. He can’t be much of a leader if he’s sulking like Chanyeol. Chanyeol feels bad, but deep down, he knows Sehun would be grateful that Junmyeon is focusing on his hyungs instead of his death.

“You can cry, hyung. You know that, right?” says Chanyeol softly, avoiding the other’s eyes. Like he said, he knew Junmyeon sort of had to shove Sehun’s death to the side in order to focus on the present and what is to come in the future.

“Don’t worry about me, Chanyeol-ah.” Said male takes a chance to meet his leader’s eyes. It seems like his words have triggered tears since he can now see the glassy look of them now. Even when it’s just the two of them, he still tries to be the strong one.

“Hyung.” Chanyeol reaches out to gently tug the smaller male into his embrace. His own tears rise up and spill over, but they need this. They both need this hug at this moment. They need to let it all out.

Junmyeon automatically breaks into sobs in his arms much like Chanyeol did the day Sehun passed. It pretty much confirms Chanyeol’s suspicions that Junmyeon has been dealing with all of this alone. Junmyeon has been so concerned with the wellbeing of the others that he’s been refusing to let the others in and help him cope with Sehun’s death. If they see their leader break, the rest will follow along like cracks in glass, eventually shattering altogether.

It makes Chanyeol feel like a horrible little brother/ team member. They are each supposed to take care of each other, but Chanyeol has failed tremendously. He isn’t the only one who lost someone important to him, yet he’s been acting like he’s the only one who did.

Junmyeon stays curled up in his arms for who knows how long, soaking Chanyeol’s ratty shirt with tears and probably snot. Chanyeol reaches over to pluck a few tissues from the box on his nightstand. The amount of boxes he has gone through since Sehun died is absurd.

“Here.” He nudges the older up into an upright position and hands over the tissues, keeping one for himself so he can wipe his own eyes and nose. Junmyeon blows into them before placing them on the nightstand.

“You’re killing yourself, Chanyeol,” he then whispers, voice still thick and wobbly. He runs a hand through Chanyeol’s hair and the latter flinches. His hair is a greasy mess, plus the last one who had done this action to him was Sehun. He had done it the night before his mission. Chanyeol couldn’t sleep due to how worried he was for his boyfriend, so Sehun had spent almost an hour running his hand through his hair to lull him into sleep.

“You barely eat, and what you do is not enough for your body. You’re skin and bones at this rate.” Junmyeon’s hand drops down to trace along his protruding cheekbones and sickly looking skin. “I worry about you, so much. I wish there was more I could do.”

Chanyeol stares into his hyung’s puffy eyes. He never even thought of the fact that Junmyeon has been taking Chanyeol’s state personally. Chanyeol knows that he’s doing this all on his own. He knows that he fell so deep into a hole of depression and grief that at this rate it seems impossible to escape. Despite all the advances of the other members trying to get through to him, he has pushed them all away.

“I have to do this all myself,” he finally admits out loud. The other seven will be here to support him, but Chanyeol has now realized that he is the only one who can start his journey to going back to living his life, even if that life is now without Sehun.

“You know we are always here for you. We love you. We are a family. We are one.” Junmyeon manages to crack a smile after crying his heart out, proud of Chanyeol’s words. It appears that after all this time, Chanyeol is finally starting to turn around.

“We will be there with you every step of the way.” Junmyeon knows it’s tough. They’ve all been struggling to adjust to the darkness and cold that came after Sehun’s death. His high pitched laugh and bright, cheeky smile as he played along with his hyungs can no longer ward away the gloominess. It’s a work in progress, but one day they will get there. Their family will remain as strong as ever.

“I know you will be,” Chanyeol says confidently, already feeling the slightest bit better. It only took a hundred talks for him to finally have a reality check. He will get better, for himself, for his members, for Toben and Vivi, and finally for Sehun, wherever his spirit may be.

“I think Minseok and Baekhyun are out getting more groceries and sushi for lunch later. Would you like to join?” Junmyeon knows how much Chanyeol loves sushi. Chanyeol knows what Junmyeon is trying to do, and this time, he caves in.

“Yeah, sounds good.”

Lunch time rolls around and Chanyeol graces the table with his presence. For the past few months, Chanyeol had only come down for breakfast and dinner, only eating maybe a little snack as ‘lunch’. No one bothered him when he never joined them for the meal, but now, they greet him as if he’s always joined them for lunch.

He eats the sushi that Baek and Minseok bought, noticing that the kinds they got include some of Chanyeol’s favorite. Though his stomach feels sick afterwards, it’s not with sadness. This time, he has eaten the most he has in two months. His stomach has become accustomed to the small portions and now has no idea what to do with all the pieces of sushi he had ingested.

“Hyung, I’m gonna go get my hair cut today. Want to come with me?” Jongin asks him once lunch is over. Chanyeol glances up at the younger in surprise.

He hasn’t left Junmyeon’s mansion in weeks, save for when he went back to his and Sehun’s house to gather the dogs, clothes, and other stuff. After that, the closest thing he’s gotten to going out was Junmyeon’s backyard. It’s fenced in so all the dogs can run freely around it. He also has a koi pond with a miniature waterfall that’s made out of rocks and very relaxing to watch. Though it’s been too cold to be outside for more than a few minutes, the sting of the cold doesn’t touch him. The chill in his heart is far worse.

“Yeah,” he agrees after a few seconds of reflecting. “I would love to come.”

Chanyeol, for the first time in two months, feels normal again as Jongin plops them down in an alleyway near the hair salon they frequent. After Jongin had asked him if he wanted to come, he did a quick wash up and even brushed his teeth. His hair might still look like a mess even with the brushing he did, but he knows that if he washed it, the dye wouldn’t work as well.

“I’m so glad you came!” Jongin has a smile on his face, and it hits Chanyeol that this is the first genuine smile he’s seen on the younger since Sehun died. He’s happy, all because Chanyeol agreed to come with him.

“I’m glad I came with you.” Chanyeol’s face softens at seeing the glimmer in Jongin’s eyes. Chanyeol knows that he’s still affected by his best friend’s death, but right now, Jongin is happy over something so simple.

“You need a good wash, cut, and color,” he giggles, leading them out of the alleyway and onto the busy sidewalk. Everyone is too focused on their phones or getting to their destination to notice the two slipping out of the alleyway.

“Tell me about it.” Chanyeol rolls his eyes playfully. He feels like his soul has lightened up just a bit. He knows Sehun would be proud of seeing him finally put himself back together, even if it’s baby steps. Chanyeol prays he’s looking over him, but he already knows that he is.

That night as Chanyeol lays in bed with two sleeping pups curled up by his side, he feels like a whole new person.

Both Jongin and he spent the afternoon getting their hair cut like planned. Since Jongin had already gone back to black, he stayed with Chanyeol as the black dye for his hair set even after he was done getting his hair washed and cut. After they paid, Jongin had asked him if he wanted to head back home or stay out a bit longer before they had to go back for dinner.

Chanyeol was worn out from the activities after being inactive for so long, but after seeing the barely concealed hope on the other’s face, Chanyeol brushed off his tiredness and told Jongin he didn’t mind staying out. Once again, Chanyeol was able to see a genuine smile from the younger.

They had gone to a café a few streets over from the salon. Chanyeol had wished Jongin could just teleport them since it was cold, but it was located in an area where there were just too many people. Though having to walk, the cold air refreshed Chanyeol’s lungs and he felt more alive.

In the café they bought hot chocolates to sip as they sat inside the cozy spot. A bag containing a box of assorted sweets swung from Jongin’s arms as they then wandered into an unpopulated area once they were done with their drinks. Thankfully, Jongin was able to teleport them straight back to Junmyeon’s warm house.

Dinner was the liveliest Chanyeol had ever seen it. He received various compliments from the others when they saw his freshly cut and dyed hair. It made Chanyeol feel good, and even more like his old self. He ate a lot at dinner too, much to the pleasure of everyone, especially Kyungsoo.

After dinner, tea was made and they all chowed down on the pastries that Chanyeol and Jongin picked up. Afterwards, they gathered in the spacious living room to watch a movie, Jongin curled up into Chanyeol’s right side with Toben and Vivi on his left.

Chanyeol had briefly wished that Sehun was on his other side like he always was, but he shook it away. Sadly, wishing wouldn’t get him anywhere in this case. He had to remember that he is in the now and the seven guys gathered on the various couches are his family and he’ll be damned if he lets anything happen to them.

Chanyeol should be dead tired after the day he had. After the movie was over, they all silently agreed that it was time for sleep, even though it wasn’t that late. They all said their goodnights and separated into their respective rooms.

For the first time, Chanyeol feels bothered by the lack of company. For the past few months, he was annoyed with anyone who tried to spend time with him, but now he wishes to be back downstairs where they were just watching a movie. He knows he can sneak in to anyone’s bedroom and enjoy their presence, but Chanyeol doesn’t want to bother anyone in case they are already asleep.

So, here he lays, staring up at the ceiling like he’s been doing every night for the past two months. However, his thoughts are different. He continues to replay today and how happy everyone was when he actually did something more besides take three bites of food then immediately scurry back to his room.

It’s a nice feeling, seeing everyone smile again. Even the fact that his body felt lighter after today makes the fuzzy feeling grow. He also thinks of Junmyeon and his conversation, about how he’s the only one who can get his life sorted again after such heartbreak.

The more minutes pass and the more his mind spirals, he realizes one thing.

In order for him to truly overcome Sehun’s death, he has to take revenge on X-Sehůn.

The plan was that each of them takes out their evil version, but with Sehun gone, who will defeat Sehůn? Chanyeol supposes that they could all gang up on him, but Chanyeol is now determined to destroy the one who took everything from him. The more he fantasizes about burning the clone to a crisp, the more his fingers itch to actually do it.

When he actually manages to fall asleep, this time his dreams are of the fall of X-EXO. Once they are all destroyed, then Sehun’s death will have been rightfully avenged.

Come morning time, Chanyeol officially decides to put his agenda to kill Sehůn into action. At the table, the guys are once again pleased with the amount of food Chanyeol eats, but they don’t know of his true reasoning as to why he is forcing himself to eat.

Chanyeol knows that his body has grown weak from lack of exerting his muscles. He is, without a doubt, the strongest out of them when it comes to pure strength. However, if they calculated strength with the use of their powers, then Kyungsoo would win that by a landslide.

With his body practically malnourished, there is no way he would survive one of his workouts he did before all of this. If he decides to take on Sehůn in this state, Sehůn would kill him in an instant. Which is why he has to work back into being at the peak of his health. It will take an incredible amount of hard work to build back up what he has lost, but he’s going to do it all for the sake of Sehun.

“I’m glad you’re finally coming around.”

Junmyeon enters Chanyeol’s room once more. Chanyeol had been calculating how much/ what he needs to eat and what workout to start off with after having not done any in so long when Junmyeon had knocked on the door. He shut his laptop and placed it next to him as he granted the older entrance.

“You’re right, Sehun wouldn’t want to see me like this.” That thought is what is keeping him going. If he thinks about how worried Sehun would be if he were right in front of him, it motivates him. He doesn’t want to upset his late boyfriend even in the afterlife. Chanyeol has wallowed in his own misery enough. He can still continue to grieve, but this time, he can do it in a healthy way.

“I’m glad you finally realized that.” Junmyeon wanders over and embraces the younger in a tight squeeze of a hug. Chanyeol makes a wheezing sound. Junmyeon might look small and fragile, but those muscles are very misleading.

“Have you found anything new about X-EXO?” Chanyeol changes the subject once Junmyeon releases him and his lungs don’t feel compressed anymore. It’s the first time he’s asked anything about the clones in the past two months. He prays Junmyeon doesn’t find it suspicious, but maybe it will just appear that Chanyeol is interested in helping out in tracking them down. Technically, he does want to help, just more so for his personal agenda than overall.

“Not really,” another defeated sigh escapes Junmyeon’s lips. He settles on the bed. “It appears that since Sehun’s mission, there’s been nothing. They’ve been moving from place to place, but no abnormal activities have been reported since. We still have no confirmation about Minseok, Yixing, and Kyungsoo having a clone either. We decided that after Sehun it was better that they permanently moved back here.”

“I see.”

It does seem a bit fishy that when EXO are at their weakest, X-EXO hasn’t made any sort of attack. It could be possible Sehun wounded his clone, but there is no confirming that. They’re basically sitting ducks until X-EXO finally decides to do something. They need to locate X-EXO once again as soon as possible.

“All we can do is be patient and not let our guard down. We’re doing everything we can to track them.” The withered face that crossed over Junmyeon as he just spoke then melts. “We’re about to start some training. You feel up for it?” he asks, obviously not keen on keeping with the current topic.

“Yeah, I need to get back into shape,” laughs Chanyeol, standing up at the same time as Junmyeon. He couldn’t think of better timing. Training with the others will only build up his strength faster. In no time he will be able to finally take on X-Sehůn.

The next three months seem to pass by in a blur, unlike how beforehand a minute felt like an hour to Chanyeol.

He’s been working tirelessly in order to build back up his lost muscle mass. Kyungsoo had been helping him eat better and the rest of the guys have been working out alongside him. Working out and surrounding himself with his brothers has drastically improved Chanyeol’s mood. Don’t get him wrong, he still misses Sehun and he will continue to for a long, long time, but the others are doing their best to make Chanyeol happy. He couldn’t be more thankful for them.

The stronger he becomes, mentally and physically, the closer he becomes to finding Sehůn himself. He long ago already established that he would tell no one about his plans to take on Sehůn by himself. If his members know of his secret mission, they will do everything in their power to prevent him from completing it.

Since then to now there have been a few updates of X-EXO. It appears they have an approximate idea of where Chën is. With this information, Jongdae had begun to vigorously train in preparation. Chanyeol had offered to help him. Thankfully, Jongdae took him up on his offer and the two began to work out almost every day for hours.

Another update that piqued Chanyeol’s interest is that it appears that Sehůn, for some unknown reason, has settled back into the building where he was first found. The only logical reason they could come up with as to why he is back there is because Sehůn thought it was finally safe to return.

Chanyeol thinks it’s fate that it seems like the being he wants to crush most is back on the grid. The news has only caused him to train harder. His flames that were once dull and weak due to his depression have now been restored to their full strength.

Everyone continues to shower him in praise for his turn around, but they still are unaware of the true reasoning. When it’s all done and over with he will deal with the aftermath of going behind their backs, but it’s all for Sehun.

Today is the day that he has finally decided to find Sehůn. After his months of preparing, he’s now reached the point where he feels confident enough to take on the clone.

He had moved back to the apartment he had shared with Sehun in the past three months as well. Returning home for more than a day had sent him into a slump since he was surrounded by Sehun’s items and memories of them, but his fire was ignited once again when he thought of getting his revenge for his deceased boyfriend.

Even back at home he had been working out on the equipment they had strictly since it was Chanyeol’s buying. Though, since Junmyeon’s house has a literal gym in it that all of the members are free to use, Chanyeol hung out more at his house rather than his own. He only ever returned back home to take care of the dogs, eat breakfast and dinner, and sleep.

Living back in his own house makes sneaking out a whole hell of a lot easier. He knows Junmyeon’s house is equipped with a grand security system, and Chanyeol has no clue how to disarm it. If he was still there, Jongin teleporting him would be his only way out. Even if he asked the younger, there was no way he would agree to do so.

When Chanyeol is all dressed in his tactical clothing, he says his goodbyes to Vivi and Toben, who tilt their heads at him since he is leaving at almost midnight. His car has never sounded so loud as he turns it on and leaves the apartment complex.

The entire two hour drive, Chanyeol drives in silence. From the numerous times they have researched the building, Chanyeol knows its exact location and what’s around it.

The place is actually an abandoned art building southeast of where the EXO’s base is located. It’s unsettling that Sehůn is so close, but at this moment, Chanyeol is thankful for it. If he was located further away, Chanyeol would have no choice but to beg Jongin to teleport him, which, again, would never happen.

The art building was used long before any of them were born. As they researched the place, news articles revealed that it was shut down due to rampant mold growth and other poor conditions. The owners of the building did not have enough money for all the repairs, thus forcing them to close their doors. After years, no one has yet to demolish the building, which also resides in a poorer area of the country.

Chanyeol isn’t exactly sure what to expect when he finally goes head to head with Sehůn. It unnerves him not knowing what he’s getting into, but he chants in his head that this is all for Sehun.

The only solid plan he has is to park his car a few blocks away to avoid X-Sehůn being able to hear the sound of the engine and spot his headlights. Then, he will enter through the door in which Sehun was to use when Jongin dropped him off. With lots of research, they were able to gather the layout of the building. Chanyeol had downloaded all the information about the place one day and began his scheming in the privacy of his own home.

He doesn’t even know for sure if Sehůn will be there. Sure, recently they have discovered that he had been milling around the abandoned building quite frequently, but that still doesn’t mean he will be there for sure. Chanyeol figures that even if the clone isn’t there, it would be good to snoop around the place to see if he can uncover anything to his and the rest of EXO’s advantage.

Parking his car, he shuts the door as quietly as possible. This area seems exactly like a ghost town, causing Chanyeol to shiver at how eerily silent it is. Dimly lit and flickering streetlamps cast little light for Chanyeol to see as he heads in the direction of where the art building stands.

He only has the lights to guide him since if he tries to use a fireball to light his way, Sehůn, if he is in the building, might spot him. He slinks along past the rundown looking buildings, keeping his eyes peeled for anything suspicious.

As the building grows closer in the distance, Chanyeol can now see that the place appears to be lit up. He can only assume that the clone is inside. He wonders how the building manages to have power when it was long since abandoned, but then he realizes that Jongdae’s clone must have somehow fixed up the place to have electricity.

Chanyeol can barely breathe as he steps closer and closer to the place where his boyfriend was shot with the arrow. Through his nerves, he can feel his skin heat up in anticipation of burning the clone and the building down. With each second that ticks by, Chanyeol is a moment closer to avenging Sehun.

When he finally makes it up to the building and the door that will lead him into it, he first gently presses the door to see if it will budge just like that. When it doesn’t, he grips the handle. Sucking is a silent breath, he turns it and pushes it open. He breathes out when it doesn’t creak as he opens it enough for him to slip inside.

The building is freezing cold and smells old and dusty. Chanyeol suddenly remembers about the mold issue, but that’s the least of his problems at this rate. He intends to end this all as quickly as possible.

Mentally going over the floor plan in his head, Chanyeol figures that the clone will most likely be located in the center of the building where the main art pieces used to be on display. Chanyeol has to maneuver through smaller hallways and rooms in order to make it the main room.

He steps as carefully as he can, breathing shallowly so that not even his breaths can give him away. It’s difficult to not make even the faintest sound where the whole building is completely silent, but Chanyeol does his best.

With memorizing the entire layout, Chanyeol knows exactly the route he has to take in order to get to the center of the building. In the distance, he can see the glowing of light coming from the area he is in search of. He treads down the hallway. Once he rounds the corner he will be in the center of the building.

“You have finally come.”

Chanyeol abruptly stops, frozen in his spot at the sound of the voice. It’s a voice he hasn’t heard in five long months. He knows the voice doesn’t belong to the one he loves, but his heart can’t help to ache when hearing the familiar voice.

“There’s no use in pretending to hide, Chanyeol. I know you’re there.”

Again, Chanyeol’s heart pangs when the clone says his name. Though the voice might sound cold and more sinister, it still undeniably sounds like Sehun. Deciding that Sehůn is indeed right that there is no point in hiding, Chanyeol musters up all the courage and hatred he has to round the corner of the hallway.

He steps out, exposing himself to the clone. His breath hitches when the first thing he notices is what Sehůn is sitting on. It’s an ordinary wooden chair, but what is decorating it makes Chanyeol want to heave. Sticking out from the back of Sehůn’s chair are Sehun’s arrows. Beside the clone’s feet are even more of the arrows scattered around.

“Like what I’ve done?” mocks Sehůn when once he notices what Chanyeol’s attention is focused on. “Your little boyfriend and my pathetic excuse of a double left them for me.”

“Shut up!” Chanyeol fumes. Sehun was anything but pathetic. He trained endlessly to strengthen himself so he could go head to head with his clone. Unconsciously, his palms begin to itch to release his fury in the form of fire.

“I really thought he would put up more of a fight. I was honestly disappointed.” Sehůn lets out a dramatic sigh, propping his chin on his hand nonchalantly, almost as if he is bored.

“Though, I was satisfied with his expression when I turned an arrow right back to him. He wasn’t expecting it all. Tell me, did he die or did your healer manage to save him?” The evil being grins maliciously, already fully knowing the answer to his question.

“He was my everything,” Chanyeol’s voice is thick with tears as he stares directly into Sehůn’s eyes.

Everything about the clone looks exactly like his late love, but that was to be expected. They have the same short, black hair. The same pale skin and brown eyes. Same build. Though, what really sets the two apart is the large wound over Sehůn’s right eye. Chanyeol hopes that his Sehun was the one who caused it.

“I’m so sorry I took him away from you.” Sehůn’s voice contains no remorse at all, the words further instigating Chanyeol. “Have you come to join him?” He tilts his head to the side as if he were playing a confused puppy.

“I’ll kill you!” rages Chanyeol, sick of listening to the doppelganger talk. A second later, he lashes out, sending out a massive wave of fire in the direction of where his enemy is still sitting.

Before the flames can reach Sehůn, there is a gust of wind. Instantly, the flames are swept aside and extinguished by the sheer force of the wind. Chanyeol falters at the action, then realizing that since Sehůn can control wind, he can create strong enough gusts of it that are able to counteract his fire.

With his determination to get revenge on his boyfriend he had overlooked one of the biggest advantages that both Sehun and his doppelganger have over him. How could he have been so fucking stupid?

“Nice try. I’m impressed. You’re already doing a better job at trying to take me out than Sehun.” Sehůn still sits on his trophy chair, eyes piercing into Chanyeol’s while a sick grin plays on his lips.

Chanyeol snarls, even more rage building up inside him as his deceased boyfriend continues to be mocked. He rushes towards the evil being, more determined than ever to end this. His fists flame with bright fire as he swings at Sehůn who is now standing up. Another gush of air sends him to the ground and shoved at least ten feet back. He then springs back up as if nothing happened, glaring daggers at Sehůn even if his body now aches where he landed onto the hard ground.

“How about this? We fight fair. No powers. How does that sound?” Sehůn asks casually. This whole fight is affecting Chanyeol way more than it’s affecting the other. Sehůn just looks like a bored kid waiting to go home. Chanyeol shakes his head when he reflects that he’s seen the same look on Sehun on multiple occasions when meetings had taken way too long.

“You think I’m going to trust you?” shouts back Chanyeol, the gap still distancing the two.

Sehůn remains silent, knowing that eventually, the EXO member will attack again. He does a few seconds later, throwing out fireballs in his direction. Sehůn, with lightning fast reflexes, is able to evade each and every one of them. Seeing that the clone was serious with his words, Chanyeol stops releasing his fireballs.

Frustration clouds his judgment since he screams and lashes out again, this time only with his bare fists. Sehůn continues to doge the attacks, making a fool out of the man as he desperately attempts to land a punch or even a kick onto him.

“Why aren’t you fighting back?” cries out Chanyeol, blinded by his desire for revenge. His chest is rapidly rising and falling, not due to tiredness, but due to the hate he still has bottled up inside him.

“Do you want me to fight back?” Sehůn stands statue still, merely watching the enraged EXO member.

Another war cry sounding scream leaves Chanyeol’s mouth when he once again charges at him. This time, instead of dodging, he blocks Chanyeol’s swinging fist that’s on fire. Sehun sends out a burst of wind, extinguishing the flames once again. As Sehun does that, Chanyeol tries to sneak another punch with his left hand, but Sehůn is quick to realize.

He jumps away, this time narrowly managing to evade a kick from Chanyeol. When he manages to slip a quick jab into Chanyeol’s ribs and the latter jerks away at the reaction, does Sehůn get an idea.

He needs to wear down Chanyeol, not physically, but emotionally. It is clear as day that even though five months have passed, Chanyeol’s wound is still fresh and tender. Even now his own judgment is clouded by his still raging grief. All Sehůn has to do is let him think he won then flip it back on him. It’s a perfect idea.

Sehůn has to prevent himself from maniacally grinning at his sudden idea. Another flamed fist is his thrown his way, and Sehůn purposefully reacts a second too late so that the fist lands on his cheek, burning for a few seconds before the flames vanish.

Though the pain does faze him, he’s still able to keep up his guard. However, that isn’t his plan, so when he fakes a delayed reaction again, Chanyeol manages to swing his leg around, knocking Sehůn to the ground. He barely has time to register his new position before Chanyeol drops down on him to pin him to the floor.

Sehůn stares up at the male on top of him, a very obvious and smug expression written across his face. With pure strength alone, he’s keeping the clone’s arms planted against his sides. Sehůn is secretly impressed with the man’s strength. Even if the EXO member is his enemy, he can’t deny that his strength is something to admire. Still, Chanyeol continues to underestimate Sehůn.

Even with his arms locked at his sides, he’s still able to use his wind power. With a forceful gust, he slams it against Chanyeol. Chanyeol is unable to anchor himself against the powerful blast. It slammed into his chest, causing him to be shoved backwards. Sehůn scrambles off the floor and lunges for Chanyeol to now hold him down on the cold flooring. His grips his wrists in a bruising hold. If the man underneath him tries to struggle or use his powers, Sehůn can still easily use his wind to knock the flames out or him back onto the ground.

Chanyeol is momentarily stunned by the change in position. He gazes up into the other’s eyes, being able to have a way closer look of the clone now.

It’s like all the fight is drained out of Chanyeol as his eyes roam over the exact same face as his dead boyfriend’s. Without the eye wound and now burnt cheek, from feet away Chanyeol wouldn’t be able to tell that this isn’t the person he has spent years loving.

He misses Sehun, and the feelings of pain and grief come flooding back as he stares back at the clone. Though the look in his eyes gives it all away with how evil he truly is, Chanyeol can envision the soft look Sehun always had in his eyes. He can picture crystal clear the happiness that lit them up and turned his eyes into crescents when Chanyeol surprised him with a new love song he had written or even when one of his hyungs bought him snacks.

Without him even noticing, tears escape Chanyeol’s eyes, slipping down his temples and dripping onto the floor.

He can’t do it. He thought he could kill Sehůn, but he can’t. Not when he shares the same face as the deceased love of his life. It will be like watching Sehun die all over again. Deep down he even feels guilty for the blistering skin of his cheek from where he had hit him. Even then, Sehun’s face is still the prettiest he’s ever seen.

Sehůn sits on top of the crying male, silently observing. He was expecting this. He planned to wear the EXO member out so much that it left him powerless and defeated. Sehůn knew Chanyeol wouldn’t be able to defeat him. Sehun is his greatest weakness, even in death. Though Sehůn took away the real Sehun, his face still bears the same one as his weakness.

“Stay with me,” offers Sehůn, trying to school his voice into a gentle, soothing one. He hopes that he sounds more like the real Sehun with his words. Chanyeol’s glassy eyes peer up at him wordlessly as he spoke.

“You’re very cute. Sehunnie sure picked a good looking guy to love,” the clone muses. “The thing is, we’re technically the same people, but my Chanyeol hyung doesn’t like me like that.” Sehůn busts out a pout and puppy dog eyes that he surely knows will remind Chanyeol of Sehun.

“Stop… talking,” Chanyeol grits out through his tears. The look in his eyes morphs back into fire. He begins to struggle, trying his best to throw off the being on top of him. However, it’s fruitless since Sehůn uses his powers to keep him pressed flat on the ground.

“We can run away. No one will find us. We can start a new life together. It will be like Sehun never left.” Sehůn leans down, bringing his face closer to the male’s. Chanyeol turns his head to the side, avoiding eye contact. “C’mon, Yeollie.”

Chanyeol loathes the fact that despite the hatred he has for the clone, his mind forces images into his brain of what it would be like if he went with the clone. He could fool himself into thinking that it’s the real Sehun. That they can continue to live in perfect harmony with each other. That they can get married and then adopt a little boy or girl like they’ve always dreamed up. Sometimes pretending is better than facing reality….

“I’ll never betray my brothers!” spits out Chanyeol, whipping his head back to glare at him, broken from his trance. Sadly, the fire doesn’t last for long since his expression visibly falters once he notices how close the other’s face is suddenly to his.

If his hands were free, he could easily reach up to cup his cheeks, being extra mindful of the wound he inflicted. The last time he had done that was as Sehun was dying. He misses Sehun’s touch and he misses the feel of his smooth, impossibly perfect skin. He had been craving to feel it again for months.

Sehůn can’t miss how Chanyeol’s eyes dull the more the man looks at him. Inwardly, he praises himself for breaking down such a strong EXO member. He had thought it would take a lot more effort into making Chanyeol submit, but he’s practically limp under him, lost in the thoughts of his deceased lover. Hell, he even noticed how he reacted when he offered him run away with him. That far away daydream like look.

“I’m just like Sehun, believe it or not. Same laugh, same smile, same feel.” Sehůn closes the distance between their faces and presses his lips onto Chanyeol’s.

Chanyeol automatically freezes when he suddenly feels lips on his own, but it’s such a familiar sensation that he’s been aching to feel since he last kissed Sehun before he left for his mission.

It’s almost as if Chanyeol isn’t in control of his body as he responds to Sehůn’s kiss. Chanyeol’s lips chase after the warmth and softness of Sehůn’s. If he closes his eyes tight he can pretend that his Sehun is still alive and that it’s him that’s kissing him and not an evil double. Everything about Sehůn’s lips is exactly the same, even the pink coloring of them.

When he feels Sehůn’s tongue lick across his bottom lip, he can’t help himself when he opens his mouth enough to allow him to slip it inside. Chanyeol shivers as Sehůn runs his tongue along the inside of his mouth. Sehůn even tastes the same… but Chanyeol doesn’t feel even a pinch of love and passion that these kinds of kisses would be overflowing with.

Chanyeol wretches his head to the side, ripping his lips away from Sehůn’s. His chest heaves for lost air. He feels mortified and ashamed by his actions. He cannot believe he let himself become weak enough to let the clone kiss him. A new wave of fury builds up inside him until it recedes and a new emotion replaces it.

Panic.

No matter how much air he is trying to pull into his lungs, his breathing doesn’t regulate. In fact, it seems like the opposite is happening. Each passing second it’s becoming harder and harder to breathe. Horrified, Chanyeol whips his head back to stare up into Sehůn’s eyes, a playful glint flickering in them as they stare down into his wide, rounded ones. With his power, he’s managing to steal all of the oxygen out of Chanyeol’s lungs.

He tries to fight through the foggy feeling that is invading his brain, but it’s of no use. Black spots begin to appear in his vision, obscuring it and distorting his sight to create the illusion that there are now two Sehůn’s. He gapes like a fish out of water, feeling exactly like one as his body becomes weaker and weaker without air.

As Chanyeol is on the brink of passing out, he can vaguely see Sehůn dipping back down. He barely registers the faintest brush of lips against his own again before he hears a so soft, so soothing, so welcoming voice whisper right by his ear, “Think about it, Chanyeollie.”

That’s the last thing he hears before he succumbs to the darkness dragging his body down.

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope this was able to tug on your heartstrings!!! I can't tell if I did a good job or not since I read it over so many times that I became immune to all the sad stuff. Also, I apologize if the fight scene was a little...meh... writing action is not my forte. Please let me know what you thought!! And thank you for reading <3


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